Forgiveness, NVC and starting over

I'm trying to forgive my internet for being such a bastard, but it's cool, I have let it go. I miss my friends so much, especially since I've been a bit disconnected from the world. I've been doing quite a large number of crossword puzzles to get my mind off of shit. You'd think I don't have a phone, but for the past few weeks I may have been down with the flu.

I was just catching up on my newsletters and read about NVC - non-violent communication. According to the article, I have to clear my throat chakra (yogi speak), which has clearly been blocked for a long time. There I always thought I was good at it, but how wrong was I. I'm a terrible communicator. There is nothing I even want to write here because it's too public, and I feel like deleting the past 8 years of my blogging life, and just starting over. 

I'm going through yet another transitional phase, where I listen to a few select songs, do the same things over and over, and withdraw into my mindspace. I only want to see certain folks, and be in certain places; comfortable and safe, friendly and inviting. Anything else is shut out mostly. I can't finish this post because I'm putting myself to sleep.