I'm home!! Amazingly my computer booted up as soon as I turned it on...after long stretches of being off it usually takes a while to warm up. Tsk.

So, let's see. I sniffled, coughed, took medicine, slept, talked and enjoyed cold sea breeze this weekend. A couple Scrabble games and cards passed the time. Tan? Me? Umm. Sorta. We lost 2 days of beach time because yesterday it rained. Good day to cuddle up in bed though.

Today the beach was really nice. Sun was very very hot, so I slapped on the sunblock and relaxed...almost fell asleep on the sand. Woo. The water was damn cold though but I guess you could call it refreshing.

My head is still clogged up for some ungodly reason, so I'm still not better :( It just isn't fairrrr!!!! Off I go again.

Pharmacists rock. I mean pharmaceutical drugs in general. I don't care about herbal things or anything natural. I don't care I want to get well. Clarinase has me nice and stable no. Woohoo! I seem to do a lot of advertising for these people...tsk. I should get paid now for all of this.

I have to bid my bloggies farewell for 4 days :( A plus tard! I'll be at the beach getting some rays...or sleep...whichever!

Somehow I'm still drugged. Tsk. I'm worse today. Imagine that - with all these damned drugs my cold or whatever the hell it is has worsened. Bah. Not like I have anywhere to go or anything, though I would like to stay awake long enough to do some web work!

My thinking phase is over. I'll be ranting about something else another time.

I have a mother who loves me. I got up, had lunch (since I got up at lunch time), got drugged with Comtrex, and poofed a couple hours after. I'm still woozy. And you know what? Non-drowsy formula stuff sends me to sleep faster that the drowy kind. Freak am I. Yes proud of it. So mom conked me out for basically the whole day. That's love for ya :)

Guess it's not time yet for the Mother's Day rant and me showing off on the fact that I have a very very cool mommy. Bleh.

*zzz again*

I'm feeling ...weird. Or is it sleepy? I'm supposed to be re-vamping this other website buttt my creativity has swooshed away to 0 once again. Great. Maybe I need sleep. Yehh that's it. Do I really have the flu? Tsk. Is it just the dust in the air that's causing my allergies to fleck the hell up?

So no partying for me. :( Oh well. Looky that. Another night home with a 100lb bag of salt. Here we go round the coconut tree. The only one in Trinidad missing the lime....say what. No skin off my back ..nooo no hard feelings anywhere. Idiot me. Once again. Bah.

I've finished one of the books in the Don Juan epic. Hmmph. He's just escaped death and is now being sent away. This is after being caught in this guy's wife'd bed. Tsk tsk naughty boy. He's 16 she's oh 23. Lol. Hubby is 50. You think???

Comtrex kicking in. Trace needing some sleep. These people are wearing me out on my group blog now. I embrace it though, and so glad I have them :)

What a day. Cool thing is that my group bloggers are doing great. More action there than here I can say that for sure. I have to actually keep up with that thing's pace.

So I picked up "The Works of Lord Byron". Daring yes. Long very. Epics galore with very teensy fonts. I'm attempting to read Don Juan. Love story or something so far. Interesting, though I've gotten sidetracked so many times tonight with this and that or this one and that one as the case may be.

Fingers weary...eyes closing. Mmm beddddd!

I got reeled into watching this movie today (not knowing how mushy it was), called Dream of an Insomniac. Holy Mother of Jesus. Actually I stomached it, because it was totally intriguing from an artist's point of view. If you don't want to know about the story stop here because I'm gonna spill it.

It told of a young girl...a chronic insomniac for about 17 years. Meets guy and her world now has colour :) She's a budding actress moving to Hollywood. He's a writer whose inspiration has gone poof. Artists. So in talking, they make a pact that he'd get her to sleep and she'd inspire him to write again.

All this time duh she's head over heels. Trouble is he has this boring girlfriend who he's staying with just for stability and "love".
So she basically begs him to move away with her. He says no la di dah she's heartbroken. He eventually realises his mistake and he goes and they smooch and live happily ever after. Oh yeh and the deal they made has come thru. Crick crack :)

So what do we learn here? Hmm. Dreamers and artists rock dammit! Jus you'll probably agree with me here - I doubt no one else will..maybe Stac :) I must see that again...just for the quotes. Stac will definitely enjoy this. It's about passion and following your heart - not what's stable and logical.

Oh my mood, my mood. Strange. It's a pleasant change though. I like thinking about all this sometimes - well discussing it with friends. Hmm I've obviously been too negligent, but that's life for you..always getting in the way of dreaming. Hah. Argh.

But then. Dream or reality? How should you live your life? Pursuing what's in your heart or what's in everyone else's hearts? *sigh* Ah well more food for thought. My conscious mind tells me to forget about it because the truth is scary. Subconsciously I'll dream about it or something and try to straighten the swirling mass of confusion that find its abode in my head.

On another note. How do I interpret signs? No not street signs. How do the things that happen in your daily life affect your destiny? How can you figure them out? Should you? I believe there is a meaning to everything...reason, that will ultimately affect what's gonna happen in the future. Why do I want to know so badly? Grr. I guess if I know then all my decisions will be biased. Hmmmm. It's just like the Oracle (here we go Matrix style again) said. "If I hadn't told you about the vase would you have knocked it over?" Well whatever the line is.

*think think ponder ponder*

Apparently it's late and I'm supposed to be sleeping? 2 am. Lovely. Btw I hate how Blogger gets the time wrong even though I put it as EST time. This has been my longest post for a while. You can tell I'm not busy anymore. :o)

So I got some sleep, but it wasn't enough. I had these weird dreams and heard songs in it. Probably the radio was playing and my subconscious picked it up and filtered it into my weirdass dreams. Ugh. *scratches mosquito bite on leg* Blah. Yes so dreams are the strangest things. Some are oddly prophetic. Hmm yes. So I believe that... They seem to have a freaky way of coming through. Those "gut feelings" too. All of these inexplicable goingson just scare me so much sometimes.

Ok random thought process racing through my mind again. Great. Err does this happen only when I'm this weary of spirit mind and body? I'll try my best not to get sick. Need vitamins, yoga and some serious meditation scenes.

*jumps* Frick something to get my blood pressure up. A grasshopper leaped on my desk and surprised me. I don't need anything funny happening at this hour, though at any moment anything can happen. Oh how I know this all too well. That's for another post though. Goodnight world sweet dreams.

I've got a midday heat headache. Yes I get those. When the sun is too hot I get a splitting headache and it only goes away when it gets cooler. Why am I telling you this? Totally irrelevant, but it's how I'm feeling... *sigh*

Signs, karma, fate, blah. Decisions decisions. I'm not quite sure what to do about a certain application to a certain school. I hate them for having a gdamn po box address. I hate myself for not sending stuff sooner. But oh well...everything for a reason. But what does this mean I have to do? So confused. But not dead yet so a big :P to everything.

I just have to get through this week, do some updating on this site and another and find me a job. Sounds like fun? I'll take a nice long nap first though. *nods off into deep deep sleep*

Ok so the really bad mood passed. Why am I online still again? Don't I have enough work to do as it is? Hmm looks like another day down the road, frustrating myself in front the computer. Things are going ...going...

*grumble*

I am acutely depressed now dammit. This is me feeling sorry for myself. It'll pass eventually yeh yeh blah but I'm not in a mood to say anything else. Some people not understanding a goddamn thing (i.e. parents n elders) just pisses me off. Of course I bottle it all up :)

I'm blogging when I should be offline working on this thing. Lovely. *throwing expletives around* Headacheus maximus. Frick dammit. Need to complete a gazillion things right this second. Why won't God just extend the day to like...24 more hours? No fair dude.

My creativity has fled....this is really not a good time to be losing it you know. Gone again...

Eeek I can't believe..ok I can, that I haven't blogged here for so long. It's just weird to come to a blog without something to answer to. This is me..alone in my thoughts. I guess I'm not feeling to be too lonely these days. Without my friends around I'd sink into some kind of sick freaky depression.

For the past few days things have been going at a rate that is tantamount to a race... It's been somewhat exciting though, to see what I'm really capable of. Haha. To push oneself to limits is fun. Ohh paint splattering, glue squirting, turpentine choking, mm joy of joys.

Staying alliiiiiivvve. Tha's what I'm doing. I must dammit. Must...get..thru..this.

*poof* Pastel calls.