Wtf. Why wasn't that published? Ugghhh.

So anyways. I spent the past couple days stressed at work, working late trying to fix up the bratty geek kids' certificates. I managed to finish all 500+ not to mention the flecky ones, all today. I am proud. Of course this required me to get dehydrated, hungry, uncomfortable, sweating, cussing, and to top it off with aching shoulders.

I'll be awaiting my massage please...someone? anyone? Bastards.

So we have a day off for Indian Arrival Day. Uhm whooopee!!!! :) Can't say how grateful I am to Indians for arriving eh. Phew - a break was needed badly. I want the rest of the week off :-/

*sleepy*

I started reading William Gibson's Neuromancer instead of the Narnia stuff.

Last night I went to see my aunt's band again. Turned out pretty good. If anyone wants a good Latin band (P'al Destino) to play at a party or something just let me know. They need gigs :)

May I bash the other band now? Lol...they sucked...again. My my am I just biased, or is it because the lead is just trying a little too hard to be *latin*? The outfits again whoa baby...not fun. The red getup (what's with the red??) was this plastic looking tie-up top that was lacking in the figure flattering scene. It was called akin to an apron. Then this kinda of wristband thing like they were in town on a Carnival Monday... no eh.

So I guess the lead is the problem in her own little world of squinting eyes singing her heart out with her back to the audience and wining very unsexily. We were appalled and sniggering porsupuesto. Bad bad - we may go to hell...but have a lot of fun on the way I guess.

I'm sleepy again.

*looks @ time* Very good. I'm still awake. Not fun...

Rav has me all excited about his sci fi collection. Ergh. I want to read all now! There's no Katherine Kerr :( *sniffle* Anyway I have to start the Narnia Chronicles. After I finished the Harry Potter series I started slacking off on the reading. Then there's Robert Jordan, Eddings. Orson Scott Card, ergh ergh so many books, so little time.

I have a logo to design - this weekend. Hmmm maybe I should spend all day on that today after class. Maybe just maybe, since I can't decide where to lime and with whom I should lime...hard choices.

Well I managed to get banned from Pier 1 - Dars went sans moi, but hey I got some sleep so yay :) I'll be awaiting a party/pickup report from her. I would have liked to be there for her installation into the party scene. Oh well. That'll teach the girl not to organise my transport earlier hehehe.

Over and out. Apparently I'm not coming home tomorrow. Right.

Good mornin sunshine! :)

TGIF. I think. I want an extension of about 6 hours for today please God. What I should be doing, I'm not. As usual. Haha. Ugh to think about it is horrifying. I'm running late on everything and well, I'm sitting here typing stuff waiting for a CD to burn, while the certificates await. Yippee. Rofl. This is so me.

Make that 10 hours. I want a nap in between. Ok 20 more minutes and I'm out of here eek. This is seriously infringing on my work time...oh well. Woopsy. People must be looking for me? Erghhhh.

What shall I rant about today? Hmm current news. More dead people. Wonderful. I'm alive today - that's always a good thing :)
I saw that Decibel went off well not as some would have expected, with Ms sexy Electra only making brief appearances. Like she really wanted to be here. Right. Obnoxious Americans. So I was hearing all the boys saying..omg I dere I dere...to see her. Hah! Hope they got an eyeful.

The Carib Beer site isn't overly shabby, though the rollover graphics suck. Excuse me while I surf idly along ok! It takes too long to load by the way. Holy mother...there are recipes on here. Ok. Kudos for that. Jus go stress yourself out over that hehehe. It's not TOO bad...could be better...not like I could do it any better...uhmm well maybe...with the right machine and time and stuff...who knows. I'm straying again.

Wonder what everyone's doing now, who's on ICQ, who's on Topaz. :-/ That's the only sucky thing about here...no instant messaging fun. *sniffle* As if. Let me go!!

Quote for the day courtesy Adrian : "I'm a pretty little princess" I just had to let that out :) I told him I'd have to quote it. *snicker*
Whee.

When I think about all the shit I have to do tomorrow I just want to curl up in a ball and sleep all day. :-/

Make a few dozen calls, burn CD, type up 500+ certificates for little whining geek brats, send e-mails, do a gazillion letters, and other misc secretary shitty jobs, all in about 5 hours or less. Wonderful. Just dandy. It's a Friday? Good God.

There's also a lime, manicure, party in store...perhaps, if I don't fall asleep before :) There was other stuff to say but my my I am dying to hit the hay.

*drops directly into dreamland*

*mutters under breath about shoes hurting*

I am in pain...so much in pain. Feet killing me. I lost my shades, I've got a million things to do and I'm not feeling to move from in front this happy 19" monitor and high speed connection. *sigh* I wanna go hommmmeee. *sob*

Trace not doin well...

Today was sooo icky. Work sucks man. I can barely do anything I need to do without there being some problem or another. Ugh whatever. Irritating.

I have other "life" stuff to do dammit. It's just a good thing it is half day, though I'll probably have to stay back bit this week (sans overtime) and finish off the crap that it's their gdamn fault is late. If they weren't so cheap and hired me for the whole day maybe things wouldn't be so late. Tskith. Tomorrow another day full of crap.

Soo many things to do. I wanna computer dammit :-/ Like a good one to play with/work on. Ughhhh.

Ok so my life isn't as bad as some people. I'm very fortunate to be alive, healthy, have food to eat every day, have a job, etc etc. Am I supposed to feel guilty because I have and someone else in need doesn't? I mean how am I supposed to feel? Sooo God said to help the poor right? Something so I think. Uh huh. So what are you supposed to give up everything you've worked hard for for someone who might be going through a bad time, learning life lessons themselves, and all of that? I don't think so.

That's today's rant. *bow*

I want ice cream. (Greattt now I'm thinking hmmm someone else can't even think about ice cream, they've had sugar water for he day) Blahhhh.

So like I need money. Badly. *cry* Everything's so confusing and long and red-taped. Hellllppp. Won't some miracle happen? I feel this headache of mine coming on again. I know I can't stress too much over this, but can't help wondering what the hell is gonna go on. Someone sponsor my college tuition...pweese? I guess this is what you get for being an artist and sans green card. Dumbass.

*points at last post.* Why wasn't that published? *mutters under breath about inefficiency*

I think I had stuff to say before I got online, but now they've slipped my aging mind.

Tell me, did you fall for a shooting star
One without a permanent scar
And did you miss me while you were looking at yourself out there
I just love this so much. I didn't like that first song Train released, but this one is pretty decent.

I've got nothing to rant about these days odd as it may seem. Too mellow? Maybe. Time for some Tetrinet I guess. Nothing else to do.

Ohh eyes burning...sleep needed...terribly.

"How did we fall, can we get up at all, are we happy where we are on a lonely little star, when it's cold is it your hope that keeps you warm?"

Let's hope this goddamn thing publishes.

My day. Overly interesting. Let's leave it at that shall we? It was better than expected, with some rather unexpected yet tolerant events. I laughed, I cried, I pondered. Full day I guess. Now it's sleep time.

What have I done? I keep doubting myself, yet the decisions we make...well gotta live with it right. *swats self* Let's hope this is the right decision. If not...well I guess I'll have to move on, hopefully not as battered as before, perhaps healed.

I have to write Stac. Dammit. As well as a host of other pplz I've been ignoring. Nats, Eric, JeroMe, aghh the list goeth on.

"I never would have opened up but you seemed so real to me, and after all the bullshit I have heard it's refreshing not to see, that I don't have to pretend..." Sarah rocks.

I am still in a mood, but I had to blog this despite Blogger shitups. My high period has gone. Whoopee. Why does it take so little to upset me, and so much to mend? My soul is so fragile...maybe more than it seems. My facade..ahh that...when inside is so brittle. I break so easily...but only when it's serious.

"I'm so afraid to love you, more afraid to lose, clinging to a past that doesn't let me choose" More Sarah. All her lyrics just amaze me...how do they connect...how they tell of my story...my history, my present.

These are the times I sit and cry, wallow in my own shallow self pity, these are my lows, my ends. It deteriorates so quickly from being a slight pissy mood to such deep depression and noone knows. Noone understands. "It's easy we all falter, but does it matter?"

I push away those I love most and live in the deepest doubt and pessimism I can muster. Fear. "I have nothing to give, and I have so much to lose here in this lonely place, tangled up in your embrace, there's nothing I'd like better than to fall."

I wish Blogger would hurry up and get things in order. Dude. Grr. I keep getting these annoying little error messages..I only hope theposts have gone through.

Happy Mother's Day. *grumbles about being broke now* Well at least I didn't have to cook..that might have killed people. It's hot. I want a/c or the beach..or a pool..something. Ice cream anyone? Spoil me nuh. I'm the reason my mommy is celebrating Mother's Day. Don't I deserve something? :)

Nothing's going on otherwise I suppose. Blah. Mood again.

Damn. 3 days of no blogging? Where have I been? I have gotten spoilt and I've not been blogging at home. *snicker* Whee! So I figured it was about time to grace the web with my presence. Like any of you people care. :P

I've been...uhh up to no good as usual. Yesterday was Farzanah's birthday, so we had a surprise for her. Ended up pretty cool despite having to wait over 2 hours for her to arrive etc. Trinis. Hmmph. No sense of time at all. It was good hanging with Kevy and the gang. It's been a while since we had a good lime like that. Talk about shit talk.

The night before I was up till 3 am kicking some boys' asses in Tetrinet...my re-addiction to this has become severe. Power hungry bitch. Haha. What I had a bad day and it helped to win ok :)

That's all for now though, I'm sleepy. Bleh.

Allo! Here I am in work...whee! Of course I incriminate only myself. I'm still looking at research stuff of course. :) What did I do last night? Oh...right. Tetris. *sigh* Despite the ass washing I got, it was still fun I guess...with the gdamn lag. Oh yay. Why are my eyes burning? Hmm.
Let me go organise my day.
*pewf*

Just so I don't forget and for the gamers Gamasutra is cool. Righto. Let me go back to serious surfing now. This is research surfing ok! Dammit :)

*looks @ date last published and screams in horror*

So I've been busy. I'm still trying to crawl through my last book, and even though it's pretty good, I just always find something else to do and that window gets all abandoned.

Last 3 days report : here we go.

Friday was lonnnng and tiring, and I still have to sort out some stuff from then. I haven't been able to read all of my e-mails since even then. *sigh* I was pretty frustrated, because I was working on a layout for a site, and it got totally screwed up because the manager decided to give me a pink logo to clash with the green site that it's supposed to be. Holy Mother. I mean come on!!! So I guess this is called an artistic challenge or something, to be able to clean up the colour mess that will happen if I plant the ugly pink thing on my lovely green page. Dammit. I had it all sorted out, but noooo. :(

Saturday was not totally better, but workable. My lesson went well with my computer student (and he needed to do work so I left half an hour earlier. Whee!), and well my ego was boosted walking down the road. That was kinda funny actually. I was cracking up because these dudes at the side of the road were all talking at once..one wanting to walk me down the road, another thinking about my well being on the road (not to get knocked down), another telling me to stay as sweet as I am. Rofllll.

So anyway. I got into town, planning to shop, meet up with Adrian to lime, then head home to dress fo rthe wedding. I got there by minutes to 11, so I walked around gaping at clothes and stuff, then roamed the mall looking at stuff I couldn't afford.

Dude was late late late, so I was cussing, and then we walked around, I tried on clothes, but I didn't like them, so I ended up with a few beauty things - no clothes. *sigh* I want some new stuff dammit. Blah.

I got home around 3, much to the disgust of my parents, who said we had to reach at the place for 4, and yet neither of them had gotten dressed. So I rushed down lunch, which was Chinese, and started getting ready. We happened to reach in time for the bride and groom's arrival at the house. We ducked the ceremony because it was too much hassle. Tons of curry. Lord. It turned out boring since I knew no one, and witnessed my parents catching up with their friends of yore. Yay.

Today I woke up just in time to get dressed to go to the next wedding. This was a Hindu one, but we managed to duck the temple etc, so we just saw the first part or whatever. Let me just say. I don't care. I'm not not not not ever getting married Hindu style. I'm sorry but I don't care. Excuse me for not wanting to go through that tra la la.

I came home, got a little nap and here I am, blogging finally. What a weekend. Let's hope this week is less busy? Or something. I just haveto do many things, I want to do many things, and I need to sleep inbetween.

"Thank you disillusionment" Alanis.

Rav's a doll for posting up my book so I can read it while I'm at work. Where am I going to find another host such as he? Dammit. I have to do serious updating and revamping of my site, which in a few months will be a year old. Ugh. Soon soon. Finding another good host will be blah.

I woke up before 6 this morning. Dreadful I must say. What has gotten into me?? This kind of behaviour is appalling. It's Thursday...yay! Which means that I have one more working day, then it's the weekend, though that being filled and all, I don't know when I'm going to actually sleep. Therefore all in all arising efore 6 on a weekday is preposterous.

Happy belated rabbit rabbit. Ok so I'm late starting up the month. I've been a bit busy at work, and when I get home, it's to chill with friends, read a little Potter, and get to sleep. There's very little e-mailing getting done inbetween as well. Hmm. I'm trying to keep up np doubt. Hey I'm getting used to this ergonomic keyboard. I'm so tired still but ah well. The rest of this week seems like it's going to be a bit busy, so this is a good thing.

I think I'm supposed to finish my Saturday night casino ordeal blog. Something's always popping up. The screaming banshee singer was the funny thing. I was almost asleep despite their spicy set. Tsk. Maybe I'm biased because it was my aunt's group they're competing with, maybe they sound like crap. Ok I'm being bad aren't I? *grin* So I was tired blah.

Sunday...uhh I think I slept for most of the day. Nothing overly exciting went down, unless I had a memory charm...uhh moving along :) Too much J.K Rowling for me.

Monday? Was there a Monday? Another busy day. My sympathies to my boss' family, there was a death, so things were weird. I tried not to cry. It brought back memories of my friend's dad who died a couple years ago in pretty much the same way. How sucky. Another reason to appreciate life and realise how close you always are to being wiped off the face of the earth. Reality check.

Yesterday, whee I got a new haircut. It's short...shorter than it's been for years...just by my neck. Allan said his hair might be longer. That's no good though, this thing with men with longer hair than I. Dammit. But I don't care. Arthur will scream if he sees it. He and a host of other boys I know are so old timish anf like girls with long hair. Stupid :P I love my hair! Thanks to my new hairdresser...finally a guy!!! I have stories about there, but I shall go no further...I blab a bit too much.

This site rocks. I know Jus will like it :) I love surfing here early in the morning. I test the speed of this thing.

Until I get a chance again!! *poofies*